This yr has been a good or bad year? I don’t know, and what lies ahead of me seem so unclear. I am 21 already, and I supposed I am to think as much as the adults are. Much stuff has been running through my head ever since the start of this year, for e.g. If I will join police force instead of army, serving 5 yrs of service instead of 2, and what if I do not get into the army, well I guess that will be a disaster for me. What occupation will I be working as, what type of house am I going to live in the future, what type of car am I going to buy, how “rich” will I be? Most importantly, where will I be after I have served the service? >.<
This year will be the last year I am going to work in Sembawang Bottle Tree Village. It used to be fun ever since 1 yr ago? BUT many things have changed; both the environment and the people. I love my working place a lot as I know most of the people over there, but those people whom I have more to chat with are leaving one by one, every time they left. I really hate saying goodbye to them as I know I will never see them again, but however I am used to it now. Sometimes under certain circumstances, human beings are force to adapt to changes no matter how unwillingly they are, those who do not adapt to it will only suffer even more. This yr most of my buddies will be going into army, the work place where I intend to let all of us meet more often has become a deserted island.
At many times, maybe trying hard is not enough, doing hard is not enough, working hard and giving all the best is not enough. Maybe I am always I small kid in everyone eyes who only know how to play. Cheering people up USED to be my specialized area, but definitely not now or in the future. I always keep silence at times, its not because I am going against anyone, or I am an idiot who only knows how to PLAY, my mind is running through lots of stuff, maybe to many people I am not thinking deep enough, but I am me, as the saying goes, a leopard never changes its spot, I can try to be as perfect as possible, but sometimes maybe the root of something in a person is really difficult to change or maybe I should say it is impossible to change. We know clearly who affects who a lot and who doesn’t, needless to say that, but the person who hurts you is usually the one whom u cherish and treasure most. 不是你的勉强也没有用， 是你的你想跑也跑不掉
A New Life
Monday, 16 November 2009 - 14:50
It's been so long dude.... so long......
i seriously hate school to core... Studying is just something which i want nothing to do with it after i get my dam diploma... I am simply not a cut out for academic... Suddenly feel so lost... emotions all stired up in me.... i always have something in mind.. This time... i lost it....
Hypocrites everywhere in school... Pretending to be the best, act like they know everything under the sun... "discussion" and "questions" on something that is ALREADY KNOWN... what's the point? just want to get a fucking dam A grade? Studying is to build high self-esteem in one life.. I feel that I am learning something which i most likely will not be using it in the workplace.. Mostly useless stufff... That's e 2 things that pissed me off.....
When will all this ever come to an end... Hypocrites everywhere, everyone is being sarcastic......what to do...... how to fight back....... confidence has been gone for years.... Idle my time all the way? or get on to do something right now..... I need finiancial knowledge, not school knowledge where i will still be working for other ppl in future.... Ppl will say, in order to understand finiancial knowledge, studying is important.... agree? To a certain extent of course.. ........................
Ok i am lost again.... even no foucs in writing blog... blood is boiling.... called chicken little just nw and tell him abt e medical check up, don know yy,, suddenly the blood just stop boiling.... After hang up and get back class,,back to pissed off mood.. Stared at a guy who tries to talk to my gf.. he say..... "sorry sorry, i asking questions only, don stare at me la".... seriously speaking.. i don give a dam.. just fuck off alright.... don even want to see his fucking face.. glib-tongued who only know how 2 please girls...
Random thing... Mood swing... life has been dam boring..... monday to friday schooling.. even wednesday, if nt got sth on to do... saturday and sunday working.... ytd one of the fran at work place ask me... wanglong... are u working 2 jobs? i say no... i am too busy with my sch and weekend job... den she said..... "aren;t u tired? u basically have no rest day at all".. i'm speechless after tat... Everyone has their own sorrows, those who appear to be smiling and laughing all e time usually is those who have tons of problems... Just tat they look things on a more positive side... People always say... "study hard, study is very important and must do very well in ur study, next time u will earn more".... It's so hard to reject that statement when one has to succeed in the shortest time, but how...... Recently de me, i have been very blur and confuse when i encounter difficulties and problems... WHY?! don ask me.... Used to be able to solve problems, no matter how difficult it is, and enjoy the sense of achievement after succeeding.. Right now.... i am only a lost kid on a street....
Every nght when i slp, i will look at the stars if there is, if nt just staring into the dark sky.... Thoughts running thru all e way, and i;ll just close my eyes gradually and BLUFFED myself that everything will be ok the next day i wake up,,,, that is definitely not how i deal with matters like these in e past...
A New Life
Wednesday, 2 September 2009 - 20:26
Gosh.. Spiders web all over my blog... Deserted Mansion blog...
Living in a whole new environment right now, with my job at UDDERS at lorong kilat, near bukitimah area.. Over there are very very rich people.. Luxury Terrace Houses, Posh Cars all over the road.. But the only car that catch my attention is Audi.. There is so many Audi Cars over there.. And you guess what, it's the latest Audi Car.. lol..
Every Morning take bus to work, get up at 6.45 although 9am start work.. Reason is..... FAR.. long distance travelling.. Inside bus 852, watching all the cars passing by, and people rushing for work.. Everyone is trying so hard to live here.. Busy city..
Listening to music every morning, old songs via new songs.. Memories flash back.. "Water" in my .......... Upon reaching the place, there were many food restaurant area all over.. Still need to walk about 5 mins to reach the work place..
People there were helpful and cheerful, but i remain silent throughout and just smile.. Reason? Don't ask me coz i don even't know it myself.. I have said less than 10 sentence since i started work.. not even when i am home..
A guy who used to work at udders with me show me around nearby the workplace today, getting me to familarise with the place so that ill feel better working over there.. It's sad to know that the supervisor whom i often used to work with have left.. Many people say that she dote on me a lot, i know that.. Miss the days we work together.. Hope your fine with ur life urh..
My working speed is really SLOW.. don know why.. can't be anymore enthu while working.. injuring myself is not something i wanted.. Guess it's becoz i'm tired out by the travelling which make me lose most concentration.. Production Line is quite boring though.. But who cares.. nobody even bother..
Anyway, i think my hairstyle or my looks is "outstanding" at the working area nearby, becoz so many keep staring and looking at me... Gosh... someone say i look too ah beng.. that's yy so many see coz tat area is rich people area.. LOL!
Leafs fallen onto the ground.. Things which i didn't notice in the past are now taken special attention by me.. Trees, flowers, cars, environment etc.. Trying to be my best.. but my body and heart is failing me.. That's life i guess.. Alright.. Shall upload photos next time in the next post..
A New Life
Tuesday, 1 September 2009 - 21:37
>.<
A New Life
- 21:37
A New Life
Sunday, 31 May 2009 - 00:03
Sound of the ocean, nature of the world, waves rushing continuously. A person called for a gathering, hearts call for yourself to attend, but mind call you to stop. What you gonna do when a thousand of burden fall down upon you. Memories are past, creating history is now and future. Many treasure the past more than now, who doesn’t urh. When the surrounding changes as the time pass by, only then one will feel emptiness within themselves. One doesn’t have the power to change the past nor the future, but present. Burying yourself with school and work, sinking deep into the ocean with limited time, to keep one from thinking about anything. Misses, craving, has now became numb. Distance drifting away, drifting to the sea, and being pulled back slightly back to shore. Living a life of daily routine requires courage within your heart to move on. The aim, the goal, the promises, the forgotten path is past. Sorrows buried in the ground, fear buried underneath the mountain. if u wan others to respect u, u 1st have to learn to respect others, now i seriously think it is not true. A leopard never change its spot, know the true meaning behind it and u will realise it. Eagle hunts for its prey, once it eyes is targeted at prey, it will not let it go. Faults in one is not all, look at the positive instead of negative, nobody is perfect. Random post: A smile a day brightens up a person day, nice words makes a person day, caring makes a person day. Treasure the ones you love, opportunities do not just fall upon you, they are hard to come by. Once they passed, it will be a no return path, regret remorseful means nothing when that time comes, come to thinking about it, and ask yourself if you have ever tried your best to pursue your happiness and never let go, treasuring every single moment. Experience and knowledge is something which many lack of, respect those people who possess it, provided that they deserve the respect. As the saying goes, a picture means more than a thousand words, I say: An action means more than a thousand words. =) alright.. going sleep le.. Nights all! =D
A New Life
Sunday, 10 May 2009 - 00:15
Ok guys.. I am back to blogging.. start with sch.. Dam sch.. hate sch.. coz I really sucks in sch.. ppl love comparing here and there, showing off the academic or results, PLEASE MAN, get some LIFE, sch doesn’t mean EVERYTHING.. -_-ll nth please me when I am in sch alright..so I shall not talk about it.. Let’s talk about something which makes my day.. haha.. =D I am back to F&B work! Dam.. although I said before I am not going do F&B again, but till now, I realise that I still love F&B the MOST! =D Ok.. 1st day of work, as usual… *BLUR* .. need to familiarise with the environment..i only make 1 fran at the work place, which the guy did not came today.. SIAN ar.. hahaha.. oh well.. today was dam packed with ppl as it is PUBLIC holiday..there wasn’t much part time staff there, but luckily I got experience OK! LOL! So can manage with the crowd.. hahaha.. This was wat happen when it is peak period, I turn around trying to look for ONE full time staff to take down orders, guess what.. there isn’t a single one around me LOL.. in the end I need to serve so many tables.. Luckily the customers understand my suituation thus they were quite friendly to me! Hahaha.. =D alright.. I am tired.. blog again some other time.. haha.. =D
A New Life